The WORST disease EVER….

There is a DISEASE that everyone should be SCARED of. It is something that is freaking RAMPANT in our society. And its KILLING our spirits, dreams and any chance we have to be our best selves. It’s called “Fear of Failure” and it is BEATEN into us from childhood.

Think about it. When you are a child do you ever question trying things out? Do you ever NOT try to walk because you are afraid to fall on the ground? Or do you ever NOT try the cartwheel in gymnastics class because you know hitting your head will hurt? NO. EVERYONE is falling around you and you just GO FOR IT until you get it! But then you go to school and your taught if you get a F on your paper, your life is over. And we spend the rest of our adult lives avoiding the prospect of failure LIKE THE PLAGUE.

NOWADAYS if you don’t “succeed” at something in everyone else’s eyes, you’re a FAILURE and thats THE WORST THING. But what even IS failure? Seriously, try and define it for yourself. Is it being FIRED right before Christmas? Is it being in 200k of defaulted student debt and not telling your husband the whole story until a week before your wedding? IS it being an actress for 4 years on national tours and then deciding it wasn’t for you? Is it starting 5 different careers before you are 28? BECAUSE I’ve done THEM ALL. DO YOU GUYS THAT FOLLOW ME think I’m a failure? Because by conventional definitions, I MOST CERTAINLY AM!

But something CRAZY happened after each one of those things…. I picked myself UP and started again until I got it right. NOT RIGHT by societies definition… RIGHT by MY definition. And each one of those things POINTED me in this direction… TODAY.

NOW think about all the things you never did because you were “afraid to fail” and think about WHAT IF you tried those things and you succeeded? Would your life look different? Would it look better? BUT let me get this straight — you were SCARED to try because of POSSIBLE failure?

THIS IDEA CONFUSES ME.

So lets dig DEEPER. Let’s call failure “fear of what other people think of you” because thats really it! Because failure is in the eye of the beholder! So in reality, YOU are scared to tell people you are trying something! Right? BUT – what if your CHILD came to you and said “I’m scared to go for this scholarship that would change my college experience BECAUSE if I don’t get it people will laugh at me.” YOU WOULD (as the adult) say: “Don’t you EVER not do something because of what people think, they don’t matter anyway”….RIGHT? SO WHY can’t we do that for ourselves?!?!?!?!?!?!

So do me a favor right now. THINK about the thing you DON’T want to try, let’s take Beachbody coaching for example. You don’t want to try because you are SCARED to fail, right? But WHAT IS failure to you?

It helps me if I can LIST out the worst case scenario so that I can logically tell myself those are SILLY fears that have been drilled into my brain from childhood.

1. Worst thing that can happen is: I get a fitness program for myself and get some good results.
2. What if I stop working out? Ok, you start again!
3. What if I start coaching and then people think its weird? WELL, odds are you don’t want those people in your life anyway! if you KNOW you are doing good for yourself and for others then why on EARTH would anyone you call a friend think thats weird. You don’t want them in your life anyway and it did you an incredible FAVOR.
4. What if I don’t reach some ridiculous standard I have in my own head on my own time? the only place you are going is FORWARD! so at least you are further than you would have been!

YOU SEE, FOR ME. the FEAR and disease that drives ME has ALWAYS been “fear of missing out” or “fear of being left behind” Or fear of getting OLD and having REGRETS.

FAILURE is WHATEVER you make it to be. BUT for most of us, its an EXCUSE we use to protect ourselves! FAILURE is NEVER the WORST CASE. The worst case is ALWAYS holding yourself back from something due to imaginary fears and then missing out on the best you. NOW, when I put it like that doesn’t that sound so freaking silly?

THE GOOD NEWS: THERE IS A CURE!! Its called stop being a weenie and GO FOR IT. DON’T BE the person who says “I WISH I DID THAT.” Find that thing you had when you were a child that TOLD you to keep trying for the cartwheel because eventually you’ll get it OR you’ll find out you don’t even like cartwheels and you’ll move onto SWIMMING.